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I know this has been done to death and back again, but the prompt just really made me think of Ten/Rose and "I bet you're gonna have a really great year." I'm still not over that scene, the first time she saw him and the last time he saw her. It's their first meeting, in a way. It's why this prompt seemed to work for them: "When I first met you was the same time that you first met me." "What a coincidence."

Memento mori is Latin for "remember you will die." I know, it takes a sad turn at the end, but I think that, in the light of experience, Rose would remember the encounter and realize what his being in pain might've meant.


“When I first met you was the same time that you first met me.”

She says it late one night, as they sit reading in bed. Puzzled, the Doctor looks up from a dense astrophysics text and over at his wife. “What a coincidence. That's normally the way it works.”

Rose gives him a light (but still painful; it's still a somewhat thick book) whack with her copy of The Time Traveler's Wife. (He hasn't the faintest why she has to read it, seeing as she lives it.) “No,” she says quietly, and the somber tone of her voice makes him sit up and take more notice. “This—” she holds up the book “—reminded me. I'd just never... thought about it. I saw you. New Year's Day, the year I met you.” She bites her lip, looking away. “You told me I was going to have a great year.”

He strokes his fingers through her hair, letting his hand rest on her back once he realizes she's faintly trembling. “And it was, wasn't it?” he says gently, and she nods, but she looks at him through a sheen of tears.

“You were in pain.”

“Might've been.” He doesn't know what he can say. His other self, his original self, is still out there somewhere. There are memories he doesn't have.

“And you were... you. You went back to see me then because... because you couldn't see me anymore. Because I'm here.” Her eyes glance around the room, and he has to admit to feeling the same bittersweetness. He would never trade his life with her, his Rose, his wife, for the world, but this is not their universe, and though they have made a life for themselves, a wonderful life, it still stings at times.

“Do you think you're all right?” she asks, closing her eyes, and he doesn't know whether he should feel love or a tinge of jealousy. Love, because this is what made him love Rose—her compassion, her concern for others. Jealousy, because while he might look the same and have the same memories of that Doctor, he still isn't really him.

He wonders if he is a new man in that other universe, if Rose was the last person to see him alive in that body. It wouldn't surprise him. They always found ways back to each other.

“To be honest, Rose, I don't know,” he says quietly, and she inches closer, wrapping his arms around his waist and burying her face in his chest.

He holds her as tightly as he can, and for a few minutes it is all they can do to mourn a loss.

 

Comments

( 11 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
haveloved
Jun. 2nd, 2011 03:44 pm (UTC)
Thank you! :) Like I said, I know it's one of those fics that's been done over and over, but my shipping heart just really wants to think Rose remembers it, LOL.
zazie11
Jun. 2nd, 2011 05:40 pm (UTC)
Oh, Trai - I love it!

I'm still not over that scene, the first time she saw him and the last time he saw her.
- I don't think any of us ever really will be! :)

“Do you think you're all right?” she asks, closing her eyes, and he doesn't know whether he should feel love or a tinge of jealousy. Love, because this is what made him love Rose—her compassion, her concern for others. Jealousy, because while he might look the same and have the same memories of that Doctor, he still isn't really him.

I like your juxtaposition here, for how they each view Ten2's "Doctorness."

Rose uses the pronoun "you," proving that she sees her new-new-new Doctor as being the same Doctor - her Doctor.

On the other hand, Ten2 is jealousy and acknowledges that they are not really the same man.

A perfect example of how bittersweet their situation is.

I love Rose/Ten2 together, and it makes me happy - even in a moment when they're mourning the Doctor who is still in the other universe - that they have each other. Who else could possibly understand that loss, than Rose and Ten2?

Gorgeous little moment, bb! :D




haveloved
Jun. 2nd, 2011 07:12 pm (UTC)
Thanks, love! :D

When Nine regenerated into Ten, I think the biggest comfort to me was that Ten was really the same man, just with a different face. If you've seen the little Children in Need minisode where Rose is freaking out and asks Ten to prove that he's really the Doctor... yeah, that was me, LOL. It took me a while to warm up to him (initially, I didn't ship him with Rose until "Rise of the Cybermen"), but it was those little glimpses I got of Nine that convinced me this was the same Doctor. I imagine it's the same way for Rose and TenII, that she views them as the same man as Ten even if he's human, hence her saying "you."

TenII, though, I always think he'd struggle a little more with that. I actually read a during-6x02 fic where Eleven tells Rory that he's jealous of TenII for being able to give Rose what he didn't, and I can see the opposite, almost, being true for TenII, that he's jealous of the real Doctor. It really is bittersweet; Billie Piper even acknowledged it in an interview (she has a quote about how you're happy when Belle kisses the Prince at the end of Beauty and the Beast, while at the same time thinking they're different!).

I really think they're the only ones who could understand that loss. For TenII, it's the death of his other self, and for Rose, it's the death of the last Doctor she really knew. I just had that image in my head of the two of them coming to that realization and I'm glad you enjoyed it!
crazyboutbillie
Jun. 2nd, 2011 08:49 pm (UTC)
I really love this scene, you can tell he just wants to hug her but has to stay in the shadows :') This is wonderfully written, I love reading fics that have Rose remembering and this was beautiful!
haveloved
Jun. 3rd, 2011 03:02 pm (UTC)
Thank you! :D I love the scene, too, although it manages to break my heart and somehow put it back together again all at the same time, LOL.
rosetylersale
Jun. 2nd, 2011 09:52 pm (UTC)
I love it! It's very sad but there is still some happiness to it. They are married, they have a life and are together but.....its not the same man.
haveloved
Jun. 3rd, 2011 03:05 pm (UTC)
Thank you; I'm glad you enjoyed!
eskridge77
Jun. 3rd, 2011 12:00 am (UTC)
Just brilliant! I actually have a lump in my throat.

He wonders if he is a new man in that other universe, if Rose was the last person to see him alive in that body. It wouldn't surprise him. They always found ways back to each other.

And may they always do so...
haveloved
Jun. 3rd, 2011 03:06 pm (UTC)
Thank you! :D
10docandr
Jun. 4th, 2011 12:05 pm (UTC)
This was bittersweet and lovely. I can't even bring myself to watch EoT, but I know all about that scene. Ten had to go to her at his end because she was his beginning.
captaintish
Jun. 6th, 2011 06:02 am (UTC)
*sniffles*
( 11 comments — Leave a comment )

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